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Funny Yo Mama Jokes

Yo mama teeth are so yellow, traffic slows down when she smiles.

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Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King when he was a Prince.

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Yo momma is so fat, when she gets on a scale it says… to be continued.

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Yo mama is so ugly, she went in a haunted house and came out with a job application.

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Yo mama is so old, her birth certificate reads: “Expired”.

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Yo momma is so fat, people jog around her for exercise.

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Yo mama is so skinny, she hula hoops with a Cheerio.

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Yo mama is so poor, she went to McDonald’s and put a milkshake on layaway.

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Yo mama is so old, she ran track with dinosaurs.

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Yo mama is so fat, when she wears her grey swimsuit at the beach the whales call her name.

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Yo mama is so fat, her bellybutton has an echo.

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Yo mama is so fat, when she walks in front of the TV, you miss 20 minutes of your show.

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Yo mama is so fat, she beeps when she backs up.
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Yo mama is so fat, she tripped over a rock and fell asleep trying to get up.
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Yo mama is so poor, when a cigarette is stepped on, she said,”Hey, who turned off the heater?”
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Yo mama is so fat, the army stole her pants for a parachute.
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Yo mama is so stupid, she went to the orthodontist to get a bluetooth.
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Yo momma is so fat, when she went to space, NASA said they found a new planet.
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Yo mama’s house is so small, she ordered a large pizza and had to eat it outside.
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Yo mama is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it’s still printing.
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Yo mama is so fat, when she wears one of those X jackets, helicopters try to land on her.
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Yo mama is so fat, when a bus hit her, she said, “Who threw that rock?”
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Yo mama is so ugly, when she walked into a bank, they turned off the cameras.

{ 269 comments… add one }
  • Jacori May 20, 2013, 11:58 am

    Yo mama so hairy she uses a lime mower to shave.

  • Jake May 20, 2013, 12:37 pm

    Yo momma so stupid she got hit by a parked car.

  • Michael May 20, 2013, 2:14 pm

    Yo mama is so fat she plays pool with the planet.
    Yo mama so fat she caused continetal drift.
    Yo mama so stupid she walked by a car with black people in it and they locked the door and she felt like a badass but then she relized it was her car.

  • That idiot May 20, 2013, 3:06 pm

    Yo mama’s so fat, when she died on Call Of Duty, the player earned a 5 KILL STREAK!

  • Hill May 22, 2013, 9:15 pm

    Yo moma head is so bald if I put a line throught it will look like my butt.

  • Tony May 23, 2013, 10:25 am

    Yo mama’s so fat every time she turns around it’s her birthday.

  • Jojo May 25, 2013, 8:47 pm

    Yo mama so dumb when she saw a yellow bus with white kids on it she said “STOP THAT TWINKIE.”

  • Assten May 27, 2013, 1:16 am

    You momma is so stupid, she put two quarters in hear ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cents.

  • D why May 27, 2013, 8:03 am

    Yo mama is so fat, she fills up the tub then turns on the water.

  • Awesome May 27, 2013, 12:14 pm

    Yo mama so ugly that even hello kitty said bye.

  • Monster May 27, 2013, 2:45 pm

    Yo mama so fat she’s on both sides if the family.
    Yo mama so fat she broke the stair way to heaven.

  • Coby May 28, 2013, 2:53 pm

    Yo mama’s so stupid when she saw a commercial for minecraft she said, “my house!”

  • Coby May 28, 2013, 2:56 pm

    Yo mamas so fat, she makes Shaq’s shoe size look like a baby’s.

  • Heypeepz May 28, 2013, 6:59 pm

    Yo mama so fat she fell on the beach and landed in China.

  • Zelly May 29, 2013, 9:50 am

    Yo mama so fat I pictured her in my mind and broke my neck.
    Yo mama so ugly, I asked her what the most hideous thing she seen was and she said a mirror.
    Yo mama house so dirty her roaches wear slippers.

  • Jordan May 29, 2013, 10:58 am

    Yo mama so ugly that when she looked in the mirror, her reflection said “Meeeeeeeerrrrrccccccccy, please?!”

  • JdogChrisman May 29, 2013, 11:08 am

    Yo mama is so ugly she threw a boomerang and it never came back.

  • Lennox May 29, 2013, 2:49 pm

    Yo mama so ugly, she made King Kong look cute :0

  • Holden May 31, 2013, 1:08 pm

    Yo mama is so stupid she tried to wash off a black eye.

  • Bob May 31, 2013, 3:41 pm

    Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the toilet, the toilet said “A B C D E F G, get the f*ck off of me.”

  • Stardust May 31, 2013, 11:47 pm

    Yo mama is so lazy she’s got a peg-leg with a kickstand.
    Yo mamas so fat she ran after a school bus full of white kids and said “stop that twinkie!”
    Yo mamas so stupid she though a scholarship was a boat full of students.
    Yo mamas so poor she has cheerios for earrings.
    Yo mamas such a redneck she drinks mountain dew through a slim jim.
    Yo mamas so ugly she needs a prescription mirror.
    Yo mamas so ghetto she mixes corn bread powder with kool aid in a KFC bucket.

  • Dakota gaudette fuller June 1, 2013, 9:04 am

    Your mamas so fat she sat on a quarter and a burger came out of George Washington nose.

  • Yoyo June 1, 2013, 12:16 pm

    Yo mama so big she broke her leg off the weight.
    Yo mama so ugly she turned medusa into stone.

  • Julia June 2, 2013, 9:05 am

    Yo mama is so stupid when she walked into Walgreens she said these walls ain’t green.
    Yo mama is so stupid she sold her computer to pay the internet.
    Yo mama is so ugly when she looks in the mirror her reflection runs away.
    Yo mama is so stupid she sold her car to pay the gas.
    Yo mama is so old she used to babysit Jesus.
    Yo mama is so stupid she tried to put M & M’s in alphabetical order.
    Yo mama is so skinny she can fry ribs on her ribs.
    Yo mama is so fat her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before her.
    Yo mama is so ugly even Freddy Krueger gets nightmares.
    Yo mama is so fat she was born on 4th 5th & 6th of march.

  • Julia June 2, 2013, 9:10 am

    Yo mama is so stupid when she found a battery and said I got the power.
    Okay this was my last one. Next week I’ll have more or tomorrow.

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