Funny Yo Mama Jokes

by Stephen on March 22, 2013 · 222 comments

in Jokes

Yo mama teeth are so yellow, traffic slows down when she smiles.

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Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King when he was a Prince.

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Yo momma is so fat, when she gets on a scale it says… to be continued.

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Yo mama is so ugly, she went in a haunted house and came out with a job application.

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Yo mama is so old, her birth certificate reads: “Expired”.

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Yo momma is so fat, people jog around her for exercise.

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Yo mama is so skinny, she hula hoops with a Cheerio.

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Yo mama is so poor, she went to McDonald’s and put a milkshake on layaway.

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Yo mama is so old, she ran track with dinosaurs.

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Yo mama is so fat, when she wears her grey swimsuit at the beach the whales call her name.

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Yo mama is so fat, her bellybutton has an echo.

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Yo mama is so fat, when she walks in front of the TV, you miss 20 minutes of your show.

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Yo mama is so fat, she beeps when she backs up.

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Yo mama is so fat, she tripped over a rock and fell asleep trying to get up.

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Yo mama is so poor, when a cigarette is stepped on, she said,”Hey, who turned off the heater?”

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Yo mama is so fat, the army stole her pants for a parachute.

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Yo mama is so stupid, she went to the orthodontist to get a bluetooth.

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Yo momma is so fat, when she went to space, NASA said they found a new planet.

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Yo mama’s house is so small, she ordered a large pizza and had to eat it outside.

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Yo mama is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it’s still printing.

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Yo mama is so fat, when she wears one of those X jackets, helicopters try to land on her.

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Yo mama is so fat, when a bus hit her, she said, “Who threw that rock?”

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Yo mama is so ugly, when she walked into a bank, they turned off the cameras.

{ 222 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Stephen March 22, 2013 at 11:27 am

Yo mama teeth are so black, the car’s check oil light comes on.

Yo mama is not so smart, she studied for a drug test.

Yo momma is so dumb, she puts lipstick on her head so she could make-up her mind.

Yo mama is so fat, she dosen’t need internet, she’s already world wide.

2 Sandy March 29, 2013 at 7:29 am

Yo mama is so fat, when she sat on the toilet it broke right into pieces.

3 Jayde March 30, 2013 at 7:14 pm

Your mama so stupid, she sat on the tv to watch the couch.

4 Stephen April 1, 2013 at 2:05 pm

Yo mammas so black she went to night school and they marked her absent.

5 Myron April 5, 2013 at 2:14 pm

Yo mama is so poor that when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, and she said “moving.”

6 Kat April 7, 2013 at 1:14 pm

Yo mamma so skinny they use her as a toothpick at wimpy.

7 Fanuel April 9, 2013 at 4:49 pm

Your mama is so fat that your father needs a GPS to find her ass.

8 Ifrah April 11, 2013 at 7:23 am

Yo mama is so fat she carries her husband like a baby.

9 Jonathan April 12, 2013 at 12:22 pm

Yo mama so fat she bought a fur coat and the whole species went extinct.

Yo mama so fat when she walked through a drive through people thought she was a Cadillac escalade.

10 Hidden April 12, 2013 at 12:39 pm

Yo mama is so fat, she doesn’t fit in this joke.

11 Hunter April 12, 2013 at 12:46 pm

Yo mama so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck.

12 Cassy April 12, 2013 at 8:09 pm

Yo mama so fat, when she sat around the house, she sat around the house!

Yo mama so black, when she was trying to move her TV at night they said “We have a GHOST!”

Yo mama so dumb, she used a ruler to measure how long she sleeps.

Yo mama so ugly, she steps in front of the mirror and it shade-rd into pieces.

Yo mama so fat, she stepped on the scale and it showed her phone number.

13 Paullister April 13, 2013 at 8:45 pm

Yo moma so stupid she walked u to a crake head and said your crake is showing…

Yo moma so ugly Bob the builder said we can’t fix that.

14 Dakota April 14, 2013 at 1:18 pm

Yo mamas so fat she left wearing hi-heals and came back wearing flats.

15 Ryan April 14, 2013 at 1:43 pm

Yo mama so fat they used her sweat to make the Pacific Ocean;(

16 Steven April 14, 2013 at 6:08 pm

Yo mamma’s so fat she jumped off the Empire State Building and bounced back up.

Yo mamma’s so dumb she got locked in the toilet store and wet her pants.

Yo mamma’s so fat when she takes 1 step she caused earthquakes measured 10.9.

Yo mamma’s so ugly she went to an ugly contest and the judges said “No professionals”

17 Rachel April 14, 2013 at 6:21 pm

Yo mama so stupid she played I got your nose with voldeamort.

18 Miles April 14, 2013 at 6:29 pm

Yo mammas so skinny that when a skeleton saw her the skeleten said “Damn!!!!”

19 Kenny April 14, 2013 at 8:53 pm

I like yo mamma jokes because they are funny and make me laugh a lot.

20 Shyanne April 14, 2013 at 8:54 pm

Yo momma’s hair is so short, she curls the hair with a grain of rice.

Yo momma’s so stupid, she got locked in big Y and starved to death.

21 Kiki April 17, 2013 at 11:02 pm

Your mom is so fat when she jumped into the ocean the Whales started singing we are family!!

Your momma so fat she had to get baptized at seaworld.

22 David April 18, 2013 at 11:11 am

Yo mamma so tall she tripped on a rock in Minnesota and fell in Florida

23 Seth April 18, 2013 at 11:12 am

Yo momma so fat she had to use cheats on Wii Fit.

24 Kyle April 18, 2013 at 1:42 pm

Your mama is so stupid she got locked in a corner store and strafed to death.

25 Anthony vaca April 18, 2013 at 6:32 pm

Your mama is so ugly she made the blind kids cry.

Your mama is so fat when she went to in and out she could go in but she can’t go out.

26 Josh April 18, 2013 at 7:48 pm

Yo mamas armpits are so hairy that Chinese people get tickeled.

27 Hayden ford April 18, 2013 at 10:18 pm

Yo mama so stupid she brought a spoon to the super bowl and the other brought cereal.

Yo mama is like a hardware store 5cents a screw.

Yo mama is like a microwave even a 4 yr old can turn her on.

28 Riley Shaw April 19, 2013 at 11:01 am

Yo mama is so fat dora can’t even explore her.

Yo mama is so stupid she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

Yo momma so dumb that she tried to put M&M’s in alphabetical order!

29 Zombie Cat April 23, 2013 at 4:39 pm

Yo mama so fat when she drives thru Mcdonalds the cashier says ca ching.

Yo mama so old when she sits in the back seat the kids don’t scream ‘are we there yet’ they scream ‘is she dead yet’.

30 Jacob April 23, 2013 at 6:51 pm

You mama is so stupid she thought shit was choclate.

You mama is so fat she sat on walmart and lowered the prices.

31 Adrain April 24, 2013 at 3:52 pm

Yo mamma so fat she sat on the toilet it said abcdef get your fat ass off of me.

32 Rafael April 25, 2013 at 7:56 am

Your momma so fat I took a pic of her 5 Christmases ago and its still printing.

33 Sam April 25, 2013 at 3:12 pm

Yo mamma so fat she went for a swim and Spain claimed her as their country.

34 Parker April 25, 2013 at 7:55 pm

Yo mama so stupid she taped a piece of paper on the T.V. and called it pay-per-view. Wa Wa Wa

35 Dakota April 25, 2013 at 8:04 pm

Yo mama is so dark she spits chocolate milk.

36 Rudybear April 25, 2013 at 10:17 pm

Yo mama is stupid that she put a book in someones face and called facebook.

37 Jordan Muchmore April 26, 2013 at 10:04 am

Yo mama so old she farts out dust.

Yo mama so stupid she went to the hobby lobby and thought paint was toothpaste.

Yo mama so black she went outside and the streetlights came on.

Yo mama so fat she uses the pacific ocean as a bath.

Yo mama so stupid she tripped over a wireless phone cord.

38 Kailie Stanichowsky April 26, 2013 at 6:38 pm

Yo mama so stupid, she bought tickets to Xbox Live.

39 Vanessa April 27, 2013 at 9:07 pm

Yo mama is so old that when she farts, dust comes out.

Yo mama is so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn’t have to kiss goodbye.

40 Hidden April 28, 2013 at 8:24 am

Yo mamma’s so old her breast milk is like powder.

41 Bob April 29, 2013 at 5:01 pm

Yo mama is so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat the other people yell taxi, taxi.

42 Jordan April 30, 2013 at 3:56 pm

Your mama so ugly when she walks in a room with kittens they run and hide.

Your mama so fat she tied a snake and made it into her bracelet.

Your mama so fat when she layed on the couch she made it into a blanket.

Your mama so tall she looked down on mt. Everest.

Your mama so big she looked on her own child and it looked like an ant.

Your mama so fat when she puts on yellow people think shes a bus.

43 Tyler April 30, 2013 at 10:52 pm

Yo mama so fat, when she passed by the T.V. you missed 2 episodes of your favorite show.

44 Q May 1, 2013 at 4:06 pm

Yo mamma so stupid when she went to the quick shop she thought she could climb mountain dew.

45 Super Sniper May 1, 2013 at 5:43 pm

Yo mama so ugly, scorpion said “STAY Over THERE!!”

Yo mama so fat when she died she broke the stair way to heaven.

46 Anonymous May 2, 2013 at 1:41 pm

Yo mama is so black, she goes to funerals naked.

Yo mama is like a chicken coop, cocks fly in and out all day.

Yo mama is like a lightswitch, even a little kid can turn her on!

47 Hendrik May 2, 2013 at 10:07 pm

Yo momma is so fat, her belt’s the equator.

48 Elizabeth May 4, 2013 at 1:56 pm

Yo mamma is so ugly her tears run down the back of her head because they’re afraid of her face.

49 Rigo May 5, 2013 at 1:12 pm

Yo mamas so poor I threw a rock at her bin she popped out and said who knocked.

Yo mama so fat when she walked past the TV I missed 3 seasons.

50 Swag May 5, 2013 at 7:23 pm

Yo mama is so fat when she sat on the iPhone she made an iPad lol.

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